Get out of it, you daft ha'porth, before you feel the back of me hand
I'll knock you clear into the middle of next week

You chuck it out, it just comes back
The stripey padded anorak
Owld and bland, crappy brand
Nightmare on a laggy-band

You feel like you've been left behind
A pikelet with the bacon rind
Mouldy tin, bum-fluff chin
Dross that's better out than in

You know your shoes are not the mode
Leave you walking pigeon-toed
Way too tight, load of shite
Make you look a proper sight

You feel like you're a laughing-stock
The village idiot in a smock
Cast-off dregs, jam-packed smegs
Mildewed git in half-mast kegs

We could've gone bananas
In Noddy-print pyjamas
But tanked-up in bandanas
We're way beyond insane

You throw it away, it comes straight back
The tab-end in the bladderwrack
Bob-a-job? Shut your gob
Light one up and be a yob

You feel your world is incomplete
A shepherd's pie without the meat
Half you see, half you get
The other half just ain't done yet

You need to get right off your face
Ciderman in outer space
Watch me crawl, watch me brawl
Rat-faced sliding down the wall

You feel your life's been ironed flat
Clouted one with a cricket-bat
Slap me here, twat me there
Bray me in me underwear

We've seen it all before, we've heard it all before
Nothing is new
We've seen it all before, we've heard it all before
Second-day stew
We've seen it all before, we've heard it all before
Hole in my shoe
We've seen it all before, we've heard it all before
Knack-all to do

Bad penny.....

You get slapped down, you bounce right back
A kelly-toy in an anorak
Keen and lean, Mr Mean
Homegrown screwball full of beans

You feel like you're the future trend
Way beyond the latest blend
Bit of this, bit of that
Load of front in a bobble-hat

You know your strides are on the mark
Sharper than the sharpest shark
Cool as cool, fit to rule
Jewels to make the dickheads drool

You feel like you’re the bees's knees
The bestest git there'll ever be
Watch me prance, watch me dance
The tool in the Mondrian underpants

We've seen it all before, we've heard it all before
Nothing is new
We've seen it all before, we've heard it all before
Second-day stew
We've seen it all before, we've heard it all before
Hole in my shoe
We've seen it all before, we've heard it all before
Knack-all to do

It's like, you know, it's like
It's like, you know, it's like
You know it is
It's like, you know, it's like
It's like, you know, it's like
You know it is
It's like, you know, it's like
It's like, you know, it's like
You know it is
It's like, you know, it's like
It's like, you know, it's like
You know it is