The First of the Bohicans


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History as interference by aliens.


released May 1, 2010

All tracks written, arranged and played by THE SPECTRAL PRiDE
Recorded, mixed and mastered by The Knobster at The Bunker
Produced by Mr Reindeer
Artwork: Frank Blunt

A Genuine Bollockbrain Product

Complete artwork, including booklet, is included with the album download.





A recording venture launched in the spring of 2004 to enable four friends to meet and indulge in a common favourite pastime: the laying down of sounds while making one another laugh.

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Track Name: The Jade Sea
Waking up for the first time
The world is such a shiny place
Every day a new horizon
Every sun a different face

On the plains the grass is swaying
Heat rises in a haze
Dust and smells gently swirling
So many signs, so many ways

We're walking, we're talking
We're painting pictures on the stones
We're laughing, we're dancing
We're shaking skulls and rattling bones

We're wandering, we're pondering
We're giving names to birds and bees
We're climbing, we're gathering
We're eating everything we see


Way back in the Dreamtime
We found a footprint in the sand
Not quite a five-toed Adam
More like a three-fingered Dan

In the trees monkeys are watching
Wondering what we've all become
Running on two feet and crouching
Mumbling songs and thumping drums

We're chipping, we're sharpening
We're making arrowheads and hooks
We're burning, we're learning
We're turning raw into cooked

We're fishing, we're hunting
We're chasing Ah-wahs on the hills
We're cutting, we're scraping
We're eating everything we kill

Track Name: The Old Tree
Feels like there's someone playing possum in the garden again
The leaves are trembling but there's no sign of airflow or rain
Feels likes there's someone who keeps hiding whenever we're near
Like a silhouette in the shade of the old tree

At night somebody's moving things about without care
One day the pathway's over here, the next over there
Some nights we stay up just to see if it's someone we know
And there like a ghost in the dark stands the old tree

You feel like you've slipped through a crack in the ground
Bones and skulls are dragging you down
Through stones and roots to petrified layers
Where cold and damp won't calm the fear

Sounds like somebody's spreading rumours in the garden again
The leaves are whispering about things never staying the same
Sounds like there's someone who keeps trying to tempt us away
As we climb through the branches up to the sky
On past the leaves and the flickering eyes
Up where the sunshine burns through the clouds
And there on the farthest bough: the fruit of the old tree
Track Name: Troy
Somedays I think this fucked-up fighting
Is never going to end
All the boss-eyed hate and slaughter
Drives me screaming round the bend

I hear the sirens in the distance
Gulls wheel across the sky
The sound clinging to my fingers
Is drenched with blood and lies

How I wish I was in Greece

We hit the beaches by the boatload
With two things on our minds
Take back the beauty that was stolen
And annihilate the swine

And now the sirens laugh and call
From the rocks across the sea
Halfway up a horse's arse
Is a sorry place to be

Greece Greece Greece
Back to ditch-digging, please
To Jason and his Golden Fleas
Won't you take me back to Greece
Track Name: Good Friday
Face down in the dust and stones
You know you'll never break bread again
Head sore with the jeers and thorns
You know you can't tell dread from disdain

One hand is a soothing hand
As it hauls you back to your feet
Lifting one more weight from your life
And then guiding you down the street

It wouldn't happen on Monday
Time to write off Tuesday
Early-closing Wednesday
Anything but Thursday

Face up to the light and wind
Godforsaken in a land of scorn
Somebody smacks a nail on the head
And you wish you'd never been born

One hand is a mighty hand
As it hauls you up to the sky
Way above all the slander and spite
And the 'Die, bastard, die!'

No more washing on Monday
Cut all meetings on Tuesday
Head on a plate on Wednesday
Oh no, not Thursday
Track Name: The Age of Discovery
O for the door to open on a morning full of light
We could cram the day with hope and watch each other's dreams ingite
O for the will to venture out beyond the beaten track
We could make the frontiers melt and never think of coming back

Sand burns, strips the soles right off your feet
Scorpions run around and then retreat
What more will Shanks's pony bring our way?
Hi ho! we're looking for our next discovery

O for the sails to fill and haul us forth like billyo
We could tumble off the charts and wake up on a foreign floor
O for the will to ride the roughest rollers coast to coast
We could slide from east to west and turn all principles to toast

Waves crash, slap you one across the chops
Winds slash, rip apart the rigs and tops
What more is nature going to throw our way?
Land ho! heading for the next discovery

Hey sailors, the world is one big place
Full of unknown quantities
And godforsaken qualities

Each journey's a random paperchase
Running over clints and grikes
Falling in and out of dykes

Soon you'll know exactly where you are
Mapping out the altitudes
The longitudes and latitudes

Then you'll find Shangri-La's not so far
All those jewels across the sea
Are everyone a rare discovery

O for the wings to fly up above the clouds so high
We could glide across the land from Timbuktu to Samerkand
O for the will to soar further than the farthest star
We could set up shop on Mars and run the routes to Achernar

Sunshine strips the lenses from your eyes
Lifelines shrivel up and vaporize
What more can exploration throw our way?
Unsure and heading for one last discovery

Stargazers, the sky is one big place
Full of glowing galaxies
And unforeseen complexities

Each light is a special point in space
Sparkling in its own location
Throbbing with its own vibration

Soon you'll know exactly what's up there
Making all the calculations
Mapping out the constellations

Then you'll find you'll take the greatest care
Emptiness and gravity
As sure as hell will kill discovery
Track Name: The Perfect Product
Life isn't perfect, it's what you make it
So let's make it perfect and smile on the day
Take every aspect, rednecks and rejects
Smooth out the defects and make them OK
Nosejobs and braces, skintucks and laces
Elegant faces are soon on their way
Youthful with lotions, magical potions
Oceans and oceans of smooth soothing clay

Step into a dream supreme
Clearer than a mountain stream
A sky blue as blue can be

All the birdies in the trees
Singing to a scented breeze
As rich as the deepest sea

Butterflies everywhere
Lurch in spirals without care
Earthed with a wild desire

So many flowers in the fields
Colourful as cockatiels
And you with your eyes on fire

You - you're just too good to be true
You you - always know exactly what to do
You you you - forever in demand
You you you you - will always understand
When I say: Oh!

The world is a cesspit, it's what we've made it
Jammed with destruction from here to doomsday
Stripped every asset, squeezed it and drained it
Turned it to dogshit and thrown it away
Deskfans and Raybans, hatstands and Cokecans
Dusty old bedpans all choked with clay
Cartons and curtains, broken-down fountains
Mountains and mountains of death and decay

Stumble through a shattered door
Out across a wasted floor
Dark as a lifeless sea

All the static in the air
Rancid as a rotten pear
The wind screaming through the trees

Skulls and bones everywhere
Thrown about without a care
The fields going up in flames

So much acid in the rain
Filled with bitterness and pain
And you, you should be ashamed

You - you're just too bad to be true
You you - never know what the hell to do
You you you - are never in demand
You you you you - just don't understand
When I say: No!
Don't want any more
There's the door
Track Name: Sussed
Old Izzy moans with his ear to the wall:
There are voices in here and they're all talking balls!
Voices in the telly, voices in the dust
Voices in his slippers, voices in his toast

Don't you know when visitors are in your home
Everything walks
There is someone punching numbers on the phone
And pulling corks
One day the lemonade is over here
The next it's there
Can't you see the monkey drinking all the beer
Is in your chair

Old Izzy yells: I've had enough of this
All these Froderick Twatters taking the piss!
So much bollocks filling up the room
Time to unpack the axe and do the Blue Baboon

Don't you know when things are crowded in a space
Tempers get frayed
Life is just another elbow in your face
With marmalade
Can't you see that one and one and one makes two
And nothing less
Hoochie-coochie hoochie-coochie-coochie-coo
You great big wuss

Old Izzy screams: What the fuck's going on?
There's a hole in the sky and the stars have all gone!
Big bright search-lights shining through the hedge
And bug-eyed bastards climbing out the fridge

Don't you know there's more to life than margarine
And magazines
There is so much beauty out there to be seen
In tangerines
Can't you feel the movement underneath your feet's
Not so robust
There are cracks appearing all along the street
You've just been sussed
Track Name: Taken
Akela says: Get ready for the day
The sunshine comes to take us all away
Two big sticks burning off the cloud
Cubs all huddled together on the ground
Put down your cobs and dibb all your dobbs
Hands off deck, stop playing with your knobs
Unpack the colanders, one for everyone
A zillion telescopes staring at the sun

The aliens are smiling in the sky

O bright light, the light is so bright
Brighter than the moon in the middle of the night
The roof has gone, the walls are on fire
The furniture's floating higher and higher
Den all shaking, looney as a toon
A flying carpet in the middle of the room
Cubs all aboard, wrapped in tinfoil
Hold on tight now, coming to the boil

The aliens are reaching from the sky

The aliens are taking us away
Fly carpet, fly!
Track Name: Bohican Blues
We all sigh together
As we all lie together
So let's all cry together
As we all fly together:

Bohican Blues...